A Short History of the United States

The Next 100 Years by Peter Zuris

Once upon a time there was a powerful nobleman named Count Koch. He had amassed a great fortune as the lands that his father had stolen had become very valuable. But, despite his great wealth, he longed for one thing.

So, he called his wisest wizards together and told them:

"I have always treated you well. But I want to control the kingdom so I can treat others just as well."

Wizard 243B spoke up first.

"Count Koch, you know that the kingdom is controlled now by all of the residents. They decide who rules, by what laws, and proscribe what is their common will to be brought about by their government."

"Off with his head" screamed Count Koch. "I asked for how I can rule the kingdom not how I can't!"

After much whispering another wizard spoke up.

"Sir, perhaps, if you hire a great marketing wizard, he can sell to the people the idea that having you in charge would be best. Perhaps he can tell some of the people that the others are their enemies and a threat to their families and their homes. Perhaps these people will be so happy that you've given them an enemy to hate they will turn over their responsibilities to you freely and convince their friends to also."

"Ahhh" said Count Koch. "You are indeed wise wizards." He turned to his guards. "Off with their heads anyway" he screamed. "Nobody must know this plot but me. Wait, even better. Sell them all to China as slaves and I will be even wealthier."

He soon found a marketing wizard named Bishop Rush. He spread the word far and wide of a new religion promising salvation to all who followed Count Koch. Many of the citizens observed the wealth Count Koch had and gladly gave up their power of voting to his power of wealth.

Tune in next year for the conclusion of this tale. Will Count Koch and Bishop Rush be successful in taking over the kingdom? Will the people of the kingdom give up the long term joy they had as masters of their own fate for the short term glitz of Count Koch and Bishop Rush and the Church of Extreme Conservatism? Stay tuned.

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