Web Search powered by Yahoo! SEARCH
What kind of person would look for an article about sex with space aliens? Only a Republican would! If you like stories about men having sex in public rest rooms... you must be a Republican.
You Must Be A Republican If.......
* You recycle your own toilet paper
* Your mom has to shave more times a month than your dad
* You see a bill board that says "Don't do crack" and it reminds you to pull up your pants.
* You stare at a carton of orange juice because it says "concentrate."
* Your bumper sticker reads: "One more woman of allegedly ill repute and We Get Gore."
* The nativity scene you set up in your yard at Christmas includes two pink flamingos and baby Jesus lying in a painted tire.
* Most of your teeth are on a chain around your neck.
* You hunt from your bedroom window.
* Your dad walks you to school because you're in the same grade.
* You use a 10 penny nail to pick your teeth after a night of road kill.
* You have ever dressed your child as a "Snot-rag" for Halloween.
* Your idea of a loaded dishwasher is getting your wife drunk.
* You and your spouse get divorced and you are still relatives.
* You go to your local ice cream store and order Copenhagen "sprinkles" on your cone.
* You know instinctively that red wine goes with opossum.
* You're always looking to find your Mother-in-Law's picture on the back of a milk carton!
* The officer that just pulled you over asks if "you have any I.D."..and you respond "About whut?"
* You take a beer to a job interview.
* You are caught roll'n your trailer down the street to jump start the heater.
* When you finish eatin' your bologna you use the rind for dental floss.
* You go to Goodwill to meet women.
* You and your friends are putting an engine in a pickup, drinking beer, and the conversation is:
Which county jail has the best food!
Comments are the sole responsibility of the person posting them. You agree not to post comments that are off topic, defamatory, obscene, abusive, threatening or an invasion of privacy. Violators may be banned. Click here for our full user agreement.
Username * Don't have an account? Sign up for a new account
Password * Can't remember? Reset your password
Comments can be shared on
Add both options by connecting your profiles.
Feels Like: 76°
Feels Like: 69°
Feels Like: 77°
View popular webcams in our area.
Sign up to read an electronic replica of the Marco Eagle newspaper.
Get your local news anywhere you go from the Marco Eagle. Download app »
See photos from local anglers with their biggest catch of the day. Submit your photos.
Our radar shows current conditions and possible severe weather.