School Page: Etiquette for eighth-graders

Expect pleasant conversation. Expect properly eaten soup.

Ladies, expect to have your chair pulled out for you when you take your seat. Always expect that, Dan promised; it's the finest point of politeness he said he learned from his recent etiquette lessons at Pine Ridge Middle School.

On Tuesday and Wednesday, the almost 90 students in teacher Sandra Thomas' eighth-grade family and consumer science class tested out their new refinement at North Naples retirement community Bentley Village.

Dressed smartly for the occasion and with napkins neatly in their laps, they shared a formal luncheon with some of the community's residents in one of the clubhouse dining rooms.

"It's good to get an actual experience," said Stefania Pensenti, 14, of the luncheon. "We don't really get to do this at school."

Among the lessons Stefania said she learned is how to make polite conversation, "and not just sit there and not to ask certain questions." Frank Sierra, 13, learned how to properly use his dining utensils, and was reminded to eat small bites, he said.

As for Dan, "the list is too long" to name all the things he learned, he said.

But remembering to pull out chairs for ladies has a certain gentlemanly charm that he plans to employ for years to come, he said.

If that's true, Thomas believes she has taught her lesson thoroughly.

"If we can get them to be aware of it in the classroom," Thomas said, "maybe they'll take it home."

To prep her students for the luncheon, students attended an in-class fashion show in the days before their outing to learn what to wear - and what not to wear. They role-played, too, to brush up on how to handle certain situations. Also, students read about Bentley Village so they could converse politely with residents about their community.

Finally, Thomas served pancakes, spaghetti and soup in her classroom for a crash course in using utensils.

"We had a whole day of just eating things properly," Steffan LoCascio, 13, recalled.

The highlight of the experience for Steffan was the same as Dan's: He'll be pulling out women's chairs for the rest of his life, he said.

Gabby Mora, 13, thinks that's a valuable piece of politeness, she said.

"They'll need that with their wives or girlfriends when they go out on dates," Gabby pointed out.

Dan, Stefania and Frank shared their luncheon table with Rosetta Moskowitz, a 4-year resident of Bentley Village. They spoke with her about her former profession, her children and when she married.

"I am a retired junior high school teacher, so for me it was like coming home," Moskowitz, 81, said of her luncheon with the students. "I enjoy them very much."

In addition to their luncheon, the students also had a chance to tour the Bentley Village kitchen and hear more about working in the food service industry.

"They were able to see firsthand some of these different careers," Thomas said.