letter to the Editor: The nitwit list

The nitwit list

Greed is good! Tax and spend! Bigger is better! More is always better! Indulge the few at the expense of many!

This is the “change” in our society that has been coming for decades. Delete honesty, integrity, accountability, morality, common sense and God!

Now, the Obama-nation is going to stimulate the economy with “skidillions” of tax dollars for the bipartisan nitwit list.

Let me add my two cents’ worth. How about a flyover from the Interstate 75 toll booth to south Collier Boulevard. Westbound traffic could avoid the toll and zoom right into our burgeoning downtown Gotham! Let’s have more parks for “responsible” pet owners. Dog lovers want their own park so Brutus can cavort and socialize. Parts of the Island already sound and smell like the pound!

However, dog owners should not be so self-indulgent. Let’s use those desolate parks for other “responsible” pet lovers who deserve recognition. What about owners of 200-pound chimps and 900-pound gorillas? What about cat lovers, big and small? They need a cat corral with a clawing and mauling coliseum; a snake pit for the folks with pythons and boas; an iguana and reptilian rodeo; an amphibian amphitheater and aquarium. Of course we need a huge aviary for our fine feathered friends so they can screech and soar as Mother Nature intended.

Tract K could be used as a Disneyland South so the kids would have “something to do!” Solar panels and wind turbines could be placed atop Space Mountain and Snow White’s castle. Fantasyland could double as a high school. The few kids could use those virtual reality video games to play baseball, golf, etc., eliminating the need for fields and courts. Adventureland would be a sanctuary for eagles and panthers.

Let’s six lane the S.S. Jolley Bridge for future influx. Pave over the swales and medians on Collier Boulevard; four lane the bike paths to make riding more sociable. Damn the traffic and congestion — there is no place to park anyway! Let’s plan bigger and far-reaching interplanetary festivals and intergalactic galas.

How about a fee-based, multi-level city parking lot at Veterans Park to accommodate the existing parking problem we have now? Oops, sorry. I lost my head. This idea may be too logical and pragmatic for the local politicos.

Come on, folks, help me out! The possibilities are endless. Don’t be a poltroon. I’m sure all you pseudo-sophisticated intellectuals and plutocrats have your own personal agendas for the list. Don’t hesitate; the Fiat money is being printed and the “check is in the mail.”

Hey, how about you “local control” wishers? Are you in control, or are you being controlled?

Thanks for your support, and may God bless America!

Sal Soldano

Marco Island